Driving lessons

It’s day three.

I had a pretty great day two.

I was all jazzed up and couldn’t sleep from the steroids, so I did all the detox things… dry brushing, mouth care, and Epsom salt bath. Some strands of hair came out and my heart stopped. I prayed it would stay in for the weekend, as I have my nephews high school graduation party today.

I started my day by walking two miles all by myself while Maddie ran. Well, not really, because I was on the phone with my dad and mom the whole time telling them every detail from the day before while they were telling me to sit and not overdo it. We always manage to laugh and joke through tears and hard times…”Linda, listen, listen to me, leeeeeeeenda, pa pow!”

I brought maddie to work and took Morgan and quinn to the beach so I could eat my sploosh by the water. I saw a bunch of students and gave out points in the “Spot Your teacher” game. I had some lovely hugs and a deep discussion about faith and Jesus with someone who just clicks with me. Turns out she is a Valley Stream girl, and there was another Valley Stream girl on the beach with us too. Never knew any of these women when I lived there, but my old hometown keeps showing up in my new one.

The kids and I picked up Joe and we went to The Giving Room for KFS Free juice day part two.

Saw more students and gave out more points. We ran into Madison’s Latin teacher and told Joe the story about how when I was pregnant and so very sick, I was given the number of another teacher who had the same condition. I called her crying, not thinking I could live through the pregnancy, and she told me I could do it.

And I did.

And years later she had Maddie as a student.

God’s hand at work again, putting people in your life you need, when you need them.

I showed Joe the store Good Food and we picked up some empanadas, went grocery shopping and gave out more points to students, then ran home, made him a quick lunch and he went to the game.

More strands of hair came out, and I decided that instead of waiting for day 21 to come and have clumps of hair start falling out, that I would take control.

A lifeshock can knock you off your feet, steal your breath, and fill you with fear. But then?

You can stand back up, breathe in slowly, and replace fear with faith.

I sent some messages to friends and family that Monday evening around 7 we can all meet at the beach. I’ve ordered some sprigs of baby’s breath, as I had a vision of baby’s breath come to me. I looked it up, and it’s a symbol of purity, love, new beginnings, and the Holy Spirit. Everyone can bring a towel to sit on, my friend Paula has found a prayer that’s perfect, and Raquel is coming to cut away all the hair that’s left, and we will let the wisps fly to the wind, to the sea, to the sky, and let our prayers carry it up to Heaven.

Then everyone can toast with whatever beverage they choose to bring. I’m not having kids come, except my own and their cousins. I’m hoping to be strong and courageous and full of peace, and then laugh.

I ran quick to where my old summer house was and saw people who i grew up with and called family. I also saw the people who bought our old bungalow, and hugged them too. They were my best friends parents from Valley Stream.

And there she is again.

Valley Stream.

I keep having a little bit of my hometown in my heart everywhere I go lately.

Quinn finished golf camp and played in the actual course. We were allowed to follow him in golf carts, and it was my first time ever driving a golf cart. It was amazing. Maddie has been nervous about driving, so we switched and I gave her the very first driving lesson of her life.

Almost two years ago I was told I wouldnt be here. I remember thinking how I would miss teaching Maddie to drive.

Then I changed the story I was telling myself. We always write the shitty first draft and say all the things we will miss, instead of all the things we will do. We can tell ourselves any story we want.

Make it the good ones.

As we watched Quinn play from hole to hole, I got a text that a friend was having a lifeshock moment.

We finished with Quinn, rob took the kids home, and I went to her and sat for two hours holding a hand, breathing, talking about Jesus and life and how blessed we are, and feeling energy. It was two of the most beautiful hours of my life.

Sometimes, just sitting in sacred space with someone and breathing can be a beautiful gift, for both people.

I came home, had dinner, and went to bed.

I’m about to go do the whole detox thing again, as my mouth is tingly and I want to stay ahead of mouth sores. I’ll see if I can go for a walk, and then I’ll rest up for the party.

I’ll get more hugs and love and heal even more.

It will be a beautiful day.

In Jesus’s name, amen.



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