Decisions and Delays

All day long we make decisions.

Some are little.

What to wear? Blow out the hair or leave it curly?

Some are little but add up to big results.

Will I eat a salad for dinner or mcdonald’s? One glass of wine or five?

Some decisions are huge.

Chemo or no chemo. This hospital that everyone said is great but OMG I feel like I’m gonna die there or this one where I feel hope but isn’t known as a top cancer hospital?

Lately there have been some spirited discussions on Facebook about another decision.

To get the flu vaccine or not?

Listen, I didn’t get it. Some of you out there think I’m crazy because it’s a tin foil hat conspiracy about vaccines and I’m on chemo. I didn’t give it to my kids either. It’s a personal decision. I stand by it. I’m doing all I can to stay healthy by eating right, cleaning, disinfecting, hand washing etc.

I told someone yesterday to turn off the news. The news is feeding the flu frenzy. You would think it’s the Black Plague. Yes, kids are getting the flu. Yes, some are dying from it. But it’s not at the panic crisis level that everyone on the news wants you to believe. They should be focusing on what’s really in your food, what we feed children, and how we are slowly killing ourselves with what we put in our mouths.

But that would cause billionaires who run this world to lose money, so…,

Quick! Divert the attention and make a panic about the flu!

Listen, if you got the vaccine or didn’t,

wash your hands, eat right, boost your immune system with a good vitamin D (Garden of Life is a good reputable brand), get outside and breathe in fresh air, wash your sheets, use thieves essential oil, exercise and stay hydrated.

Make those decisions.

I had another decision to make yesterday. I’ve been in the dark place since December. Jaw pain and body aches from medication and menopause will keep you there. Add in cold weather and rain and snow which is a bariatric pressure issue…

I make the decision to get up and fake every day.

I read some articles yesterday and reposted them on my wall. One told exactly how I feel, and the other told exactly how people treat me at times.

I am the angel of death.

People look at me and are reminded of their own mortality, as well as how miracles can happen.

It’s a weird place to be.

I sometimes feel like I should have a special cape.

I came home exhausted. Reading articles that speak to my soul can also keep me in the dark place. I just wanted to wipe off the smile I put on all day long, crash on the couch, and watch tv…(but not the news, because, you know… FLU EPIDEMIC!!!)

When I walked in the house and saw scaffolding and dust al over the house when I spent all day the day before cleaning when all I wanted to do was stay in bed…

I cried a little in the bathroom.


I slapped on a tutu, climbed that sucker, and took a picture with my kids.

Rob apologized for making me live in a construction zone for the last thirteen years, but if I can live for another forty five years, even in a construction zone, I’ll take it.


Choose to laugh over crying.

Some days it’s harder.

But it’s possible.

We have a two hour delay today.

It’s like God knew I needed two hours to get it together with my achey bones when it snows.

During today’s delay, make some good decisions. Don’t turn on the news. Spend more time hugging your kids. Talk to them about the super blue blood moon tomorrow that hasn’t been seen since 1982. I’ll be at a beach tomorrow night watching it rise.

I’ll be cold, but I’ll be there.

Today, may we all make decisions that water the seeds inside of us we want to have grow, not the fear seeds that hold us hostage.

Remember, all we need is faith the size of a mustard seed.

Good things are coming.

As long as you wash your hands, eat your fruit and veggies, and keep your kids home if they are sick.

In Jesus’s name, amen.



2 thoughts on “Decisions and Delays

  1. Too many things to love about this post! It captures your indomitable spirit in so many ways. Your fierce educated indepenence. Your Faith. Your desire to help others. Your love of family… so much! The first photo was the inspiration of our flu shot! We used to sell small ‘shots’ of the juice in little taster cups… now we go through 6 cases of pineapple a day! Love you Keri!

    Liked by 1 person

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